FabGuys.com forum: Happiness

By *igbiguymike OP Man
over a year ago

redditch

So what is happiness, would you sit back and think that you were happy, content with life.

Im 40 and have many regrets in life, i wish i could go back and correct my wrongs and change the outcome as im lay here writing this and if im completly honest with myself im no longer happy. Ive got stuck in a rut, same shit different day scenario. Im unhappy in my relationship, not overly happy in my job.

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By *ncut guyMan
over a year ago

Worthing

And they say life begins at 40…

That’s really sad reading your OP. Maybe this is the ideal time to make some changes? Use your milestone birthday as an opportunity to think about what you don’t like, and how it can be changed.

Everyone gets into ruts and questions the meaning of life so it’s very common to have these feelings (especially when you hit midlife). I hated my 40s, but loved my 30s, so I thought about the things that went right in that decade whenever I had a black mood.

If it’s your relationship, can you talk to your partner or someone else about it? Is it a new relationship or one that you feel has run its course? Maybe counselling would help? You see, you DO have options.

If the job is getting you down is it the workload? Maybe talk to a manager to get some of the pressure removed. Or talk to your doctor and get signed off. Sometimes we just need a break. If you really hate your job, think about doing something that will make you happy and start applying. It’s surprising how good you’ll feel being even a little bit more proactive.

Finally, regrets are a waste of time. We all have them, but don’t let them dominate your thinking – just focus on the present – not what happened years ago that can’t be changed.

Talk to someone, don’t bottle it up. Good luck.

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By *ichey6Man
over a year ago

aberdeen

Great advice for the man there. Nice one Uncut.

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By *ncut guyMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Thanks Richey6, just hope it helps in some way.

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By *ownmanMan
over a year ago

cromer

I discovered the delights of having sex with men when I was forty! Never looked back.lol

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By *igbiguymike OP Man
over a year ago

redditch

Thank you for the reply. Im just going through a bit of a rough patch at the minute, hopefully i can get it sorted soon enough.

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By *estafellaMan
over a year ago

Leicester

I'm fairly happy with where I am. I've learnt to not give a toss what others think of me, which gets rid of a lot of stress! I make it my aim in life to remain happy and calm, and that works for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think " happiness" is only realised when it has past, There are moments I look back on and think " I was happy then" but seldom have I been aware of being happy in the " now". So I would say happiness is elusive .....

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By *ara JevoTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Bristol East

Some people don't know what it's called, some people never find it, but all everyone is looking for in life is a thing called HAPPINESS

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By *ishop666Man
2 weeks ago

ls20

Zen it’s a state of mind for some

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By *oosterladMan
2 weeks ago

ipswich

Be comfortable in your own skin. Don't try to impress people just be yourself. If people don't like you that's their problem. Be kind and nice people will come to you. You'll be happy.

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By *oey6666Man
2 weeks ago

somewhere near you

Well I’m 71 with an illness that incurable so for the last two years we have nearly every weekend away and I eat and drink whatever I want and I do Charlie twice a month. I’m very happy. Only here once. So I’m buzzing and now wanking. Obviously in moderation. 🤪

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By *oggermanMan
2 weeks ago

Happiness is accepting that you can't change the past but you can can control your future

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By *opActiveMan
2 weeks ago

London

I’m not always sure what happiness really is, or why I don’t feel it most of the time. But I do know that the things I can do today might not be possible tomorrow. Life’s unpredictable, and nothing’s guaranteed. It’s too short to spend it feeling stuck or miserable

I just want to try the things that interest me, spend time with people I care about, and stress less about the things I can’t control

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By *shleigh1964TV/TS
2 weeks ago

penzance

I ve not really known happiness for last 4 years or so now..I do have the odd hour or so here n there but not enough to put some serotonin back in the system, my emotional system is switched off as everything is just falling apart. So figure fk it, just carry on walking the walk til I finally get to put my feet up..tis what it is

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By *shleigh1964TV/TS
2 weeks ago

penzance

"I ve not really known happiness for last 4 years or so now..I do have the odd hour or so here n there but not enough to put some serotonin back in the system, my emotional system is switched off as everything is just falling apart. So figure fk it, just carry on walking the walk til I finally get to put my feet up..tis what it is"

Odd thing with this though, is that I m content, it doesn't make sense, but I am content or numb but don't feel happy or sad about knowing I don't feel happy or sad...very strange and curious at same time

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By *hubsloverMan
2 weeks ago

East/west sussex

The most crucial aspect of life is your health; if you are in good health, you should feel truly happy. Establish small objectives for yourself to accomplish and begin with those. This approach will assist you in gradually alleviating your issues. Be truthful with yourself and recognize that there are certain things beyond your control; view them as experiences that will not recur. Everyone makes mistakes throughout their lives, but these errors provide us with valuable lessons to avoid repeating them in the future.

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By *anDadBodMan
2 weeks ago

Speke

Everyone has some sort of battle going on, ive not been truly happy for decades.

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By *ammy aka SammyTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Bedford

When you've stood on the edge ,and yo self worth is zero .then you will know xx

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By *ucker4you80Man
2 weeks ago

Calne

Happiness is not achievable, you need to realise that all of life is suffering and that you can transcend that suffering. Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it.

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By *utcock61Man
2 weeks ago

glasgow

Jeezus what a killjoy.

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By *ucker4you80Man
2 weeks ago

Calne

"Jeezus what a killjoy."

Not at all, once you realise that you spend all your time grasping at things that don't bring lasting happiness, and trying to get away from the things that you don't like, you're much better for it. Try it, look at what you're actually doing everyday and you'll see that none of it lasts.

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By *ad46Man
2 weeks ago

Bathgate

Happiness is a cigar called Hamlet from what I remember of the TV adverts back in the 1980’s. I wonder if Gregor Fisher ever did get that perfect photo lol

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By *sal paulMan
2 weeks ago

Walton

Clap along

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By *ichey6Man
2 weeks ago

aberdeen

"Happiness is not achievable, you need to realise that all of life is suffering and that you can transcend that suffering. Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it. "

...

Buddhism?

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By *ammy aka SammyTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Bedford

Happiness happiness the greatest gift that I possess and I thank the lord that ive been blessed with more than my share of happiness xx

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By *hubsloverMan
2 weeks ago

East/west sussex

"Happiness is not achievable, you need to realise that all of life is suffering and that you can transcend that suffering. Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it. "

Happiness is not achievable, Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it.

These two assertions contradict one another.

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By *0yguyMan
2 weeks ago

Cumberland

I’ll settle for contented.

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By *ucker4you80Man
2 weeks ago

Calne

"Happiness is not achievable, you need to realise that all of life is suffering and that you can transcend that suffering. Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it.

...

Buddhism?"

Indeed.

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By *ucker4you80Man
2 weeks ago

Calne

"Happiness is not achievable, you need to realise that all of life is suffering and that you can transcend that suffering. Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it.

Happiness is not achievable, Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it.

These two assertions contradict one another."

Fair point, bad wording. A better statement would be "lasting happiness is not achievable".

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By *ara JevoTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Bristol East

"Happiness is not achievable, you need to realise that all of life is suffering and that you can transcend that suffering. Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it. "

Sounds like the marketing literature from my local church

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By *hubsloverMan
2 weeks ago

East/west sussex

"Happiness is not achievable, you need to realise that all of life is suffering and that you can transcend that suffering. Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it.

Happiness is not achievable, Happiness is not lasting, stop reaching for it.

These two assertions contradict one another.

Fair point, bad wording. A better statement would be "lasting happiness is not achievable"."

Thank you for the correction. I believe life would be quite dull if it lasted indefinitely. Just think about it: if you were always content and never took any action, what would you actually learn throughout your life?

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By *ickeMan
2 weeks ago

watford

Happiness is a moment contentment is best .

Seeing my team win , or orgasm that’s happy times .

But that feeling of no stress, feeling healthy not tired .

Relaxed just enjoying life on your own or with someone.

Which then feels great .

As for position your in?

Maybe just midlife crisis time same day different shit .

Work eat sleep . Only you can change it get out rut , we all been there , get positive make up mind what you want do , go away for weekend have fun .

Don’t knock till try it went to Butlins adult Soulweekender was brilliant. Just fun .

Get something to look forward to .

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By *ichey6Man
2 weeks ago

aberdeen

I'm well aware of happiness

And what it takes to get to it

A simple word called survival

Transcends itself into betrayal

Nicky Wire

Sung by Green Gartside

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By *ustOneBearMan
2 weeks ago

Neath

Would be good to hear an update from OP to see how he is now.

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By *vmarisaTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Motherwell

Happiness and the state of being happy is all in the mind, if one can achieve peace of mind then self respect and then self awareness of ones foibles and strengths then one can be truly happy.

Mx 🍀

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By *ichey6Man
2 weeks ago

aberdeen

"Would be good to hear an update from OP to see how he is now. "

...

👍👍

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By *ucker4you80Man
2 weeks ago

Calne

"Happiness and the state of being happy is all in the mind, if one can achieve peace of mind then self respect and then self awareness of ones foibles and strengths then one can be truly happy.

Mx 🍀"

The emotion Love is the same, all in the mind, not real.

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By *vmarisaTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Motherwell

"Happiness and the state of being happy is all in the mind, if one can achieve peace of mind then self respect and then self awareness of ones foibles and strengths then one can be truly happy.

Mx 🍀

The emotion Love is the same, all in the mind, not real. "

I can't agree with you there, romantic love and lust can be confused I grant you, but as I previously stated on the love thread the mothers love for a child she grew inside her is a force of its own and that is true love. Mx 🍀

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By *ucker4you80Man
2 weeks ago

Calne

"Happiness and the state of being happy is all in the mind, if one can achieve peace of mind then self respect and then self awareness of ones foibles and strengths then one can be truly happy.

Mx 🍀

The emotion Love is the same, all in the mind, not real.

Oh well.

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By *aohiaochiaokengMan
2 weeks ago

London

Happiness is not based on external conditions or circumstances.

Happiness is a choice, decision, an attitude, or a mindset.

You can choose to be happy or unhappy.

Even though if you have everything in the world, you can still feel very unhappy if you chose to be unhappy.

The first time when my partner have sex with other guys, I was unhappy. But I made the choice to be happy. I think positively. I realize social interactions, friendships and sex with other guys are good and healthy for my partner too. Good for him to play and enjoy sex with other guys as well. We are now in an open, non-monogamous relationship, enjoying it very much and realize how much I have missed when I was strictly monogamous.

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By *ammy aka SammyTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Bedford

Many things can make you happy even death. like remembering, the good times you had with that oh so good friend .see the good love the good times xx

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