Bad jokes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
9 weeks ago

Forget about organic food. At you age you need all the preservatives you can get.

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By *excessMan
9 weeks ago

Sleaford

Why don't butchers like dildos

It's a meat substitute!

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By *awihMan
9 weeks ago

Aldershot

"Why don't butchers like dildos

It's a meat substitute!"

Same as the old, what have soya beans and dildos got in common - there both meat substitutes.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
9 weeks ago

I popped into a charity shop today and there was a stretcher leaning against a wall, the assistant spotted me looking at it and said to me, " do you want to try it out"? , I said, " No thanks,I don't want to get carried away"...

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By *rownriverMan
4 weeks ago

Crawley

I saw a sign today that made me nearly wet myself.

It said ‘Toilets closed’

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By *okkokMan
4 weeks ago

st helens

Two eggs in a pan, one egg says to the other ‘its getting hot in here, the other egg replies, wait till you get out the pan, we’re going to get our heads smashed in.

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By *rownriverMan
4 weeks ago

Crawley

A female employee got an expensive pen as a birthday gift from her boss. 🖋️

She sent him a 'Thank you note' by email.

Boss’s wife read the email and filed for divorce.

The email said: Your penis wonderful and I enjoyed using it last night. It has extra ordinary smooth flow and a firm stroke. I loved its perfect size and grip. Felt like I was in heaven when using it.

Thanks a lot.!

Moral: A "space" is an essential part of English grammar!!

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