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How do you make new friends?

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By *onmar01 OP   Couple (MM)
2 weeks ago

Blackpool

Hi guys. Me and hubby have been together nearly 35 years and as sad as it sounds we have no friends. We have work colleagues and 'friends' on Facebook but no actual real life friends.

We used to have a lodger who was with us 14 years but he moved out recently and got his own place. Without going into detail on here we had a huge row yesterday after it turned out he was a liar and had been lying to us all of the time he lived with us.

He had been storing some stuff with us but after the row yesterday I told him in no uncertain words to hire a van and get the rest of his stuff out of our house and he did that today.

So we would normally socialise with him or just chill and relax at home.

Previous jobs meant we would travel with work and be away a week or two at a time doing 50 or 60 hours a week. So never had the time or the energy to go out.

I have had to give up work and hubby now only works part time 3 shifts a week, but evenings.

So we have more time to socialise but no idea where to start. Can happily chat online for hours so happy to chat online first, but ultimately would like friends ,either singles or couples to meet for a drink, meals out etc the things that friends normally do. Friends with benefits too would be an added bonus but not set in stone.

So if anyone local or local ish would like a couple of boring old farts as friends then feel free to message.

Thanks for reading.

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By *arridMan
2 weeks ago

Brighton

It’s tricky as one gets older.

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By *noncumdumpMan
2 weeks ago

Watford

By far the easiest way to find friends is find something in common. Think of something you both enjoy doing (other than sex), such as gardening, walking, looking after animals, and then join volunteer groups doing it. Conversation is easy cos you're all there for the same reason. Good luck.

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By *ookingaroundMan
2 weeks ago

Bristol

It’s not a simple thing, but going to places where social interaction is normal, such as smaller pubs or places where people’s interests take precedence can be effective. The important thing in mine and my partner’s experience is that you generally have to make the connecting move.

I genuinely believe that off of forums, people tend towards friendliness and connection, albeit in different and sometimes hard to decode ways. Not everyone is for everyone else, but there is a lot more to be found than I think meets the eye.

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By *arridMan
2 weeks ago

Brighton


"It’s not a simple thing, but going to places where social interaction is normal, such as smaller pubs or places where people’s interests take precedence can be effective. The important thing in mine and my partner’s experience is that you generally have to make the connecting move.

I genuinely believe that off of forums, people tend towards friendliness and connection, albeit in different and sometimes hard to decode ways. Not everyone is for everyone else, but there is a lot more to be found than I think meets the eye. "

I wouldn’t want to inspect your bedding, then!

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By *ookingaroundMan
2 weeks ago

Bristol


"It’s not a simple thing, but going to places where social interaction is normal, such as smaller pubs or places where people’s interests take precedence can be effective. The important thing in mine and my partner’s experience is that you generally have to make the connecting move.

I genuinely believe that off of forums, people tend towards friendliness and connection, albeit in different and sometimes hard to decode ways. Not everyone is for everyone else, but there is a lot more to be found than I think meets the eye. I wouldn’t want to inspect your bedding, then! "

I’ve literally no idea what that means 🤣

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By *arridMan
2 weeks ago

Brighton

With the benefit of hindsight, it was a shit unfunny joke. When I posted it I was hooting with laughter. What a difference a few minutes makes.

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By *arridMan
2 weeks ago

Brighton

I’m sure I read about men and sheds and DIY and model clubs and stuff. An organisation.

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By *ookingaroundMan
2 weeks ago

Bristol


"With the benefit of hindsight, it was a shit unfunny joke. When I posted it I was hooting with laughter. What a difference a few minutes makes. "

Haha, I assumed I just totally missed it, not for the first time, I’ve been climbing for over an hour and my brain is fried.

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By *ayPonty1Man
2 weeks ago

Pontypridd

It is more difficult to make friends in later life, I have made few close friends on here though.

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By *arridMan
2 weeks ago

Brighton


"It is more difficult to make friends in later life, I have made few close friends on here though. "
that’s a good thing

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By *ammy aka SammyTV/TS
2 weeks ago

Bedford

Lots of ways to make friends think evening class learn a language or painting stuff like that book club walking groups etc x

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By *arridMan
2 weeks ago

Brighton


"Lots of ways to make friends think evening class learn a language or painting stuff like that book club walking groups etc x"

I think painting book club walking groups is a bit niche, perhaps seascapes or mountains in oils?

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By *onmar01 OP   Couple (MM)
2 weeks ago

Blackpool


"It is more difficult to make friends in later life, I have made few close friends on here though. "

Yeah often have chats with people in here, but no one local.

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By *arridMan
2 weeks ago

Brighton


"It is more difficult to make friends in later life, I have made few close friends on here though.

Yeah often have chats with people in here, but no one local."

Same. They stop after a while. I’ve decided I’m a right real boring bastard.

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By *onmar01 OP   Couple (MM)
2 weeks ago

Blackpool

[Removed by poster at 30/09/25 21:07:18]

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By *onmar01 OP   Couple (MM)
2 weeks ago

Blackpool


"It is more difficult to make friends in later life, I have made few close friends on here though.

Yeah often have chats with people in here, but no one local.

Same. They stop after a while. I’ve decided I’m a right real boring bastard. "

We'll get on well then lol

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By *licequeenbear891Man
2 weeks ago

Teddington

Go to somewhere that you might have interest, for example, if your a sports fan, go to the pub, get chatting to people about the game, or if you're into museums or walking tours, get talking to them about the tour. You'll find things in common with people and you'll make friends easily. You both seem like a lovely couple! I can talk for England so like for me I can get chatting about anything 🤣😆😅☺️☺️ it is difficult though. Key is go to somewhere you have interests and strike a conversation

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By *weddolMan
2 weeks ago

Chester

Easier said than done, but what I think you are looking for is real world stuff and that's not going to be found by chatting to people online.

So that means going out locally and looking at what's available, events, volunteering, and just generally being out and about in physical spaces.

The Internet can be a a good tool to find out about what's being advertised locally, but apart from that it's geberally a hindrance to making physical connections in the real world.

And be approachable to people! Even to people who you don't think will become a friend, friends often come though connections with acquaintances etc.

But it will take time.

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By *shleigh1964TV/TS
2 weeks ago

penzance

I work solo, miles from anyone and I work long days and hours so I'm gone in the dark, home in the dark. My life is the natural world, rarely in a built up area. A part of me craves friends but I have none and wouldn't t know where to start, so I understand your issue. Luckily for me, I'm largely content in my aloneness.

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By *rownriverMan
2 weeks ago

Crawley

Billy no mates here

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By *excessMan
2 weeks ago

Sleaford

In my younger days, my friends came from the pub or whatever sport I played.

Problem now is I pretty much don't drink, too old for football and not enough time for golf.

My friendship group has seriously dwindled !

At this point my wife is all things to me, but I need some male company sometimes and not just for sex.

it's

harder when your older.

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By *0yguyMan
2 weeks ago

Cumberland

Join a club of some sort. I have an interest in cars and joined a classic car club. Look at what you like doing…. or look at your local U3A group to join and make new friends.

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By *astDevonGuyMan
2 weeks ago

East Devon

Cut up and recycle your old ones ?

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By *007321Man
2 weeks ago

Stockport

Yep think a lot of us are in the same boat, other than work colleagues, no real friends to speak of. I’ve tried joining clubs etc ( motorcycle) but I find they don’t seem to let you in.

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By *rownriverMan
2 weeks ago

Crawley

I find that going out regularly helps with getting to know people

And developing friendships

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By *wladMan
2 weeks ago

high wycombe

I'd say start going to clubs and events that interest you and chatting to people there. It's hard to make friends later in life but not impossible

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By *imonxxx200TV/TS
2 weeks ago

Thirsk

Just talk to someone

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By *adwolf75Man
2 weeks ago

Grantham

Be proactive,join a gym,play tennis,dog walk,volunteer,interact

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By *ickeMan
2 weeks ago

watford


"I work solo, miles from anyone and I work long days and hours so I'm gone in the dark, home in the dark. My life is the natural world, rarely in a built up area. A part of me craves friends but I have none and wouldn't t know where to start, so I understand your issue. Luckily for me, I'm largely content in my aloneness."

Yes this was me now retired don’t even go out unless had to .

All drinking friends had gone .

When covid was upon us I text people or ring them .

Then thought why nobody ring me or text me ?

So left it see how long go couple weeks go by . So thought Oh! Fuck this !

can’t be bothered with people .

Talk to people on here and one other guy know that’s it give up with human race can’t be making effort when they don’t . Surprised me people know for 20 years and more just faded from my life .

What’s strange is out sight out mind .

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By *os001Man
2 weeks ago

Oxford

Maybe look to see what social activities are in your area, community groups, adult learning, things like that too?

I've noticed over the last year my friendship group is getting smaller as we all get on with our lives and sometimes I can't be bothered to do things in the evenings.

I'm going to look into what's in my area after I'm back from holiday as I do want a bit of a better friendship group.

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By *ixxy2Man
2 weeks ago

Llandudno

Bridge, chess, quiz nights, reform membership(!), ballroom dancing ...v pop down there, U3A, voluntary services, befriending services etc etc. just put yourself out there. Failing that, do a college / night class course.

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By *onmar01 OP   Couple (MM)
2 weeks ago

Blackpool

Thanks guys xx

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By *rient_topMan
2 weeks ago

Huntingdon

I think Covid definitely put a dent in people’s skills in socialising. But I think in today’s world, people’s attention spans aren’t what they were and it does seem that people don’t want to put in the effort: real friendships take work, and it’s not fair for it to be one sided.

As others have said, social groups are a good way to start. Have a look in meetup and see if there are local things that grab you? There’s also a gay organisation called outdoor ladz which organises all sorts of activities. There may also be local gay groups if you look on Facebook.

Don’t be disheartened: at least you have each other x

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By *intyreMan
2 weeks ago

Campbeltown

I’m the same. Always been a bit shy, maybe reserved, never one of putting myself out there.

Always here if anyone wants a chat

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By *otterMan
2 weeks ago

Ellon

Have you tried meetup app? Lots of groups on there, might be a local one for something you’re interested in?

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By *onmar01 OP   Couple (MM)
2 weeks ago

Blackpool


"Have you tried meetup app? Lots of groups on there, might be a local one for something you’re interested in?"

Does Gr count ? Lol 😆

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By *eekingcumsMan
2 weeks ago

Stoke/Stafford

Join one of the burgeoning right wing groups. The Nazis will take anyone in. Bonded by hatred of other people/cultures you don't know.

Guess that's quite ironic if you want to get to know new people.

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By *lim_sportyMan
2 weeks ago

stevenage


"Hi guys. Me and hubby have been together nearly 35 years and as sad as it sounds we have no friends. We have work colleagues and 'friends' on Facebook but no actual real life friends.

We used to have a lodger who was with us 14 years but he moved out recently and got his own place. Without going into detail on here we had a huge row yesterday after it turned out he was a liar and had been lying to us all of the time he lived with us.

He had been storing some stuff with us but after the row yesterday I told him in no uncertain words to hire a van and get the rest of his stuff out of our house and he did that today.

So we would normally socialise with him or just chill and relax at home.

Previous jobs meant we would travel with work and be away a week or two at a time doing 50 or 60 hours a week. So never had the time or the energy to go out.

I have had to give up work and hubby now only works part time 3 shifts a week, but evenings.

So we have more time to socialise but no idea where to start. Can happily chat online for hours so happy to chat online first, but ultimately would like friends ,either singles or couples to meet for a drink, meals out etc the things that friends normally do. Friends with benefits too would be an added bonus but not set in stone.

So if anyone local or local ish would like a couple of boring old farts as friends then feel free to message.

Thanks for reading. "

I think when you say friends with benefits, it starts to get complex and is not a good start to forming true friends.

Try and join new leisure and hobby activities,where cock isn't the agenda.

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