FabGuys.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

The best place to meet real guys.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

What exactly is being discreet?

Jump to newest
 

By *ibearius OP   Man
5 weeks ago

Greenock

I know lots of men put it on their profile but why?

Are there men who go and tell all the neighbours and friends they had sex with you?

Do they post it on their social media?

They say discreet but happy to put up a verification.

I know it’s mostly “straight” or “married”, but it’s worse when they come across homophobic when they are on here.

What do you think?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ust4inchesMan
5 weeks ago

Shrewsbury

discreet

/d{¬yao=¬}{¬y4g=¬}skri{¬y5A=¬}t/

adjective

1.

careful and prudent in one's speech or actions, especially in order to keep something confidential or to avoid embarrassment

It isn’t just for married men. Gay men can be discreet too.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *erscumdumpMan
5 weeks ago

Watford & Worth Matravers

Not reacting when you spot a fwb in the garden centre or supermarket and he is with his partner, which seems to happen to me way too often 😆 I think its about respecting that other people have a private life, and you're not part of it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *DCambsMan
5 weeks ago

Cambridge

[Removed by poster at 24/02/26 08:20:25]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *upertedMan
5 weeks ago

Nelson

I've always taken it to mean I don't walk to local corner shop in full drag.

But catch me out in a club on a Fri or Sat and I'm gonna expect you to help me with my makeup. 💄 💋

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *DCambsMan
5 weeks ago

Cambridge

It's usually guys in a relationship (with a woman or a man) who doesn't want their partner finding out. It's very easy to say that they want to have their cake and eat it, but I've been with some of those guys and have been more than happy they are making themselves available and sometimes I have been that guy.

It's complex. Someone mentioned on another thread in here that monogamy is BS and I think he's right. I think we are all essentially "groomed" by society to believe that monogamy is the pinnacle of truly loving someone and I just don't buy it any more. But even for me, that doesn't mean that I'm going to shout that from the rooftops; I still need to get by socially with friends and neighbours, so I guess I'm being "discreet" in the context of the question you pose.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ajkumarkapoorMan
5 weeks ago

England

At the beginning we were discreet. But after agreeing to an open relationship, we always tell each other who we met and have sex with. Sometimes we post in social media, the gay sex confession group discussion we joined and exchanged photos through messaging.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *dstefiMan
5 weeks ago

Solihull

A big part would be being able to maintain separation and not get clingy or pushy, doorstepping or worse whenever you need a shag. One-sided attachment is dodgy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ustOneBearMan
5 weeks ago

Neath

I always say I don’t react if I see you outside. If you say hello, I’ll talk.

I also like to keep all messages on here. No numbers exchanged. Extra level of security.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *or one nught onlyMan
5 weeks ago

dundee


"Not reacting when you spot a fwb in the garden centre or supermarket and he is with his partner, which seems to happen to me way too often 😆 I think its about respecting that other people have a private life, and you're not part of it."

The problem is this. Someone who you have been intimate with , in whatever way. Sees you in the street , but they are with their partner and just ignore you , or you can’t even go up to have a chat to , is at the very least disrespectful, hiding behind a partner and pretending they don’t even know you ,is just sad.

Guys allow and accept this , are selling themselves short and making themselves look cheap. It’s embarrassing

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ustOneBearMan
5 weeks ago

Neath


"Not reacting when you spot a fwb in the garden centre or supermarket and he is with his partner, which seems to happen to me way too often 😆 I think its about respecting that other people have a private life, and you're not part of it.

The problem is this. Someone who you have been intimate with , in whatever way. Sees you in the street , but they are with their partner and just ignore you , or you can’t even go up to have a chat to , is at the very least disrespectful, hiding behind a partner and pretending they don’t even know you ,is just sad.

Guys allow and accept this , are selling themselves short and making themselves look cheap. It’s embarrassing "

We aren’t looking for a relationship.

It’s just sex.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ornybisubslutMan
5 weeks ago

Coventry

This is a site for casual sex. I’ve met guys off here been fucked senseless see him a few days later and we just ignored each other. That’s how I like it lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackbootzMan
5 weeks ago

Hayes, Middx


"Not reacting when you spot a fwb in the garden centre or supermarket and he is with his partner, which seems to happen to me way too often 😆 I think its about respecting that other people have a private life, and you're not part of it.

The problem is this. Someone who you have been intimate with , in whatever way. Sees you in the street , but they are with their partner and just ignore you , or you can’t even go up to have a chat to , is at the very least disrespectful, hiding behind a partner and pretending they don’t even know you ,is just sad.

Guys allow and accept this , are selling themselves short and making themselves look cheap. It’s embarrassing "

No, the only one looking embarrassing is the man making ignorant judgments about how others live their lives as he can’t get his head around the fact they operate differently to him.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackbootzMan
5 weeks ago

Hayes, Middx


"…the gay sex confession group discussion we joined… "

This sounds fascinating. Do tell us more.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iss TTV/TS
5 weeks ago

Durham

It means “ I cheat but please don’t tell “ x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mandaTV/TS
5 weeks ago

Carmarthen

Straight acting discreet was shortened to SAD back in the day in gay news in the personals still relevant imo

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ames canMan
5 weeks ago

monaghan


"I know lots of men put it on their profile but why?

Are there men who go and tell all the neighbours and friends they had sex with you?

Do they post it on their social media?

They say discreet but happy to put up a verification.

I know it’s mostly “straight” or “married”, but it’s worse when they come across homophobic when they are on here.

What do you think?"
...discreet...its kinda like descrete....but different

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *dstefiMan
5 weeks ago

Solihull


"It means “ I cheat but please don’t tell “ x"

It probably does most of the time, but even if you're single and have nothing to hide you may still not want some pushy horndog showing up unannounced every time they get a hardon

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ibearius OP   Man
5 weeks ago

Greenock


"is at the very least disrespectful, hiding behind a partner and pretending they don’t even know you "

A wink, a nod or a hello if they are with someone should be acceptable.

I don’t think I’d invite someone back if they saw and completely blanked me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sal paulMan
5 weeks ago

frinton /walton area

Not leaving a note say just fucked your husband

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rMagicFingersMan
5 weeks ago

Bournemouth


"It means “ I cheat but please don’t tell “ x"

Yep. That's how I've always understood it - and I've found guys with it on their profile rather flakey when it comes to arranging a meet.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *erscumdumpMan
5 weeks ago

Watford & Worth Matravers


"Not reacting when you spot a fwb in the garden centre or supermarket and he is with his partner, which seems to happen to me way too often 😆 I think its about respecting that other people have a private life, and you're not part of it.

The problem is this. Someone who you have been intimate with , in whatever way. Sees you in the street , but they are with their partner and just ignore you , or you can’t even go up to have a chat to , is at the very least disrespectful, hiding behind a partner and pretending they don’t even know you ,is just sad.

Guys allow and accept this , are selling themselves short and making themselves look cheap. It’s embarrassing "

Thats on them, not me. I'm nobody to judge thier moral standpoint, nor anyone mine. I actually couldn't care less, they're just a fuck. He's fucking behind his wifes back - he's cheapened himself because no-strings fucking is cheap. If you dont like it, dont fuck attached men. But then again, you'd probably not know.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *teelballsMan
5 weeks ago

central london


"Not reacting when you spot a fwb in the garden centre or supermarket and he is with his partner, which seems to happen to me way too often 😆 I think its about respecting that other people have a private life, and you're not part of it.

The problem is this. Someone who you have been intimate with , in whatever way. Sees you in the street , but they are with their partner and just ignore you , or you can’t even go up to have a chat to , is at the very least disrespectful, hiding behind a partner and pretending they don’t even know you ,is just sad.

Guys allow and accept this , are selling themselves short and making themselves look cheap. It’s embarrassing "

Why do you see that as a problem ?

it’s an anonymous hook up site.

You yourself choose not to show your face. Now why would that be ?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ildwestheroMan
5 weeks ago

Llandrindod Wells


"Not reacting when you spot a fwb in the garden centre or supermarket and he is with his partner, which seems to happen to me way too often 😆 I think its about respecting that other people have a private life, and you're not part of it."

Same here. Seen a few guys with whom I've had sex and basically ignored them if they've been in company. Funniest was when I saw this guy with his wife/female partner in a supermarket. He smiled and said 'Hiya mate' and the wife even said a polite 'Hello'. No further conversation but do wonder if she knew or what their conversation was afterwards.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eefandfurMan
5 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Probably they would prefer if you didn't arrive in a pink jeep with a ballgown flowing in the wind, full hair and makeup and blaring Gloria Gaynor at full volume.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *enjamin2018Man
5 weeks ago

Gloucester


"Probably they would prefer if you didn't arrive in a pink jeep with a ballgown flowing in the wind, full hair and makeup and blaring Gloria Gaynor at full volume.

"

Knew I was doing something wrong!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *om51Man
5 weeks ago

edinburgh

Different things to different people - but 1. probably best not to run up and down the street screaming after /before the meet, or else 2. turn up unannounced at somebody’s house (where you once met). This has happened to me and was rather irritating even if I were the only one home. Or 3 - start bombarding people with WhatsApp messages. Act normal and take a hint where necessary. Just good etiquette

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *3versMan
5 weeks ago

glasgow

On the down low

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ildwestheroMan
5 weeks ago

Llandrindod Wells

As far as I am concerned my sex life is my affair and no one else's. Never flaunt it other than in specific gay bars, clubs etc. Would never betray anyone. I must be pretty discreet as a lady, whom I've known for the best part of 40 years was quite surprised when I admitted to being gay a couple of years ago. She's a very 'with-it' savvy lady and has one gay son herself. Her late husband never knew and it may not have gone down too well as he was a bit homophobic.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *0thirtyMan
5 weeks ago

Redhill

Top tip arriving at someone’s else’s house / never press the RING DOORBELL ! Yoo hoo - I’m here !

( they should use that scenario in their tv advert )

(JML version available from Robert Dyas )

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *erfieMan
5 weeks ago

mansfield woodhouse

I have bumped into two people first was a guy assisting at an allotment with others around I acted like I did not know him

Second was a single older guy I saw at a cash point said hello asked how he was few minute later he sought me out in the super market to catch up

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *anformeMan
5 weeks ago

notts

If I had been with someone and at later time I see him with a partner or someone, I wouldn't dream of approaching or hugely acknowledge them unless they did so first.

It's simple.

I. E. I have played with someone on a cruise and that evening saw him with family. He stared at me. Nodded and I returned the nod. That's all

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lackbootzMan
5 weeks ago

Hayes, Middx


"Not leaving a note say just fucked your husband "

No, you write that in her lipstick on the bathroom mirror whilst he’s not looking.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ames canMan
5 weeks ago

monaghan


"It means “ I cheat but please don’t tell “ x"
...not really...I am unattached and bi..my business ..no one else's

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *WB and NSAMan
5 weeks ago

London


"It means “ I cheat but please don’t tell “ x...not really...I am unattached and bi..my business ..no one else's "

Well said! It has nothing to do with “ I cheat but please don’t tell“ I am single, I can host, etc. etc. however it’s no body’s business but my own and the other person. I like discretion and so reciprocate it to others.

Why are people on here so judgmental!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *os001Man
5 weeks ago

Oxford

I don't kiss and tell and expect the same with the man/men I sleep with.

It's our business, nobody else.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ishop666Man
5 weeks ago

ls19

Enter home no one’s knows shag

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rookeTVTV/TS
5 weeks ago

Linwood

discreet is not leaving your false lashes under his wifes pillow x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *LASGOW 60s GUYMan
5 weeks ago

Glasgow

To me it means that if we see each other in the street we might acknowledge each other but nothing more. I don't publicise who I have sex with, no-one's business but mine and his

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *0yguyMan
5 weeks ago

Cumbria


"Not reacting when you spot a fwb in the garden centre or supermarket and he is with his partner, which seems to happen to me way too often 😆 I think its about respecting that other people have a private life, and you're not part of it."

Or rather you’re part of their private life, not their public life, and respect that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *IPMANMan
5 weeks ago

West London

Discreet is not having sex with a guy in front of his children while his wife is in the kitchen microwaving a quick pizza for everyone

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *lackbootzMan
5 weeks ago

Hayes, Middx


"Discreet is not having sex with a guy in front of his children while his wife is in the kitchen microwaving a quick pizza for everyone"

If her idea of nutrition for her children is cheap microwave pizzas, she deserves every humiliation. And perhaps the mental scars will shock them into eating healthier for the rest of their lives. It sounds a useful life lesson for all concerned to me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top