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"Mine does not know but we are naturist I some time get a hard on looking at the guys lol. Told her I get turned on with them looking at her lol " Quick thinking ther mate | |||
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"My wife knows I’m bi , she loves watching me suck a guys cock right before he fucks her " oh would she like to see a black cock in your mouth and fucking you | |||
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"Yes she does. I came out to her about 5 years ago, but she told me she always knew that I liked guys as well from the moment we met. It was extremely nerve wracking to tell her, she asked me out of the blue during covid, and I thought to myself that if I didn't tell her now, I'll never get another chance. So I did! It was the best thing I've ever done. We are closer than we have ever been (we've been together for 30 years, married for 28), she consents to me meeting guys, loves to hear about who I've met, and I always tell her before I meet someone and show her what they look like etc. She's an amazing woman and I know that I'm EXTREMELY lucky that she accepted me for whom I truly am, a very sexual, open and fun loving guy. " Exactly this. I told mine at the beginning of our relationship. She knows everything about what I do and when I meet. It turns her on so much. If the guy is good. I’ll invite him to join us both. | |||
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"Yes, your wife knows. She's either just biding her time until the kids have left home or she's decided she can't be bothered with divorce at her age, as you are useful for putting up shelves and checking the car tyres. "100% correct. The level of delusion is comedy. It's why they get caught. | |||
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"Yes she does. I came out to her about 5 years ago, but she told me she always knew that I liked guys as well from the moment we met. It was extremely nerve wracking to tell her, she asked me out of the blue during covid, and I thought to myself that if I didn't tell her now, I'll never get another chance. So I did! It was the best thing I've ever done. We are closer than we have ever been (we've been together for 30 years, married for 28), she consents to me meeting guys, loves to hear about who I've met, and I always tell her before I meet someone and show her what they look like etc. She's an amazing woman and I know that I'm EXTREMELY lucky that she accepted me for whom I truly am, a very sexual, open and fun loving guy. " Very very similar to my relationship with my wife. We are both truly blessed in that regard. | |||
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"Does she know your on here " both my last partners did and swung with me.....In fact it's how I met one of them | |||
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"Yes she does. I came out to her about 5 years ago, but she told me she always knew that I liked guys as well from the moment we met. It was extremely nerve wracking to tell her, she asked me out of the blue during covid, and I thought to myself that if I didn't tell her now, I'll never get another chance. So I did! It was the best thing I've ever done. We are closer than we have ever been (we've been together for 30 years, married for 28), she consents to me meeting guys, loves to hear about who I've met, and I always tell her before I meet someone and show her what they look like etc. She's an amazing woman and I know that I'm EXTREMELY lucky that she accepted me for whom I truly am, a very sexual, open and fun loving guy. Exactly this. I told mine at the beginning of our relationship. She knows everything about what I do and when I meet. It turns her on so much. If the guy is good. I’ll invite him to join us both. " Same here.  | |||
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"Trust me, she might not say anything, but she knows. Its the guys who think she doesn't know who become complacent and eventually it blows up in their face." Tell us please, what makes you certain that you think our wives and GFs know we're on here. | |||
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"Trust me, she might not say anything, but she knows. Its the guys who think she doesn't know who become complacent and eventually it blows up in their face. Tell us please, what makes you certain that you think our wives and GFs know we're on here. " I didn't say she knows you are on here (but she probably does, just pop over to mums net to see that), but everything else, yeah she knows. Unless your partner is an imbecile, she notices everything. Your smell, your routines, your moods, small changes in behaviour, those tiny things you think are nothing are all something to a womans intuition. Years as a therapist and a common thing I used to hear from partners is "does he think I'm stupid?". She knows, she always did, she just keeps quiet about it. And still guys wonder why she switches off the sex. | |||
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"To answer for about 65% of the user base, which is probably an understatement, no she does not. " So you keep telling yourself  | |||
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"Doesn’t know I’m on here - despite what some know-it-alls say. I haven’t been with many and I’ve been super-discreet so far. I recon she does suspect that I’m bi because I was the one to buy the strap on that she pegs me with..." Hilarious self-delusion. “super-discreet”… You don’t think she might have noticed if the women’s gear you’re wearing is hers and has been moved or touched or you have some other gear stashed somewhere. It’s impossible to hide something in a house from any female. I’ve learnt that and I’m gay! As for buying the strap-on… You don’t think she might be quietly thinking - well if he likes this up his arse… From my own real-life experiences, it’s not the fact that women found out their partners were cheating with other men that made them angry, it was the fact their partners thought they were so witless they hadn’t worked something out already that made them furious. Hilarious self-delusion. | |||
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"I’m still attached to my testicles, so I’m guessing not" Exactly! | |||
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"Doesn’t know I’m on here - despite what some know-it-alls say. I haven’t been with many and I’ve been super-discreet so far. I recon she does suspect that I’m bi because I was the one to buy the strap on that she pegs me with... Hilarious self-delusion. “super- discreet”… I suspect your right, mine knows as i told her the day we met, I think the deception is the most hurtful thing, You don’t think she might have noticed if the women’s gear you’re wearing is hers and has been moved or touched or you have some other gear stashed somewhere. It’s impossible to hide something in a house from any female. I’ve learnt that and I’m gay! As for buying the strap-on… You don’t think she might be quietly thinking - well if he likes this up his arse… From my own real-life experiences, it’s not the fact that women found out their partners were cheating with other men that made them angry, it was the fact their partners thought they were so witless they hadn’t worked something out already that made them furious. Hilarious self-delusion. " | |||
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"Doesn’t know I’m on here - despite what some know-it-alls say. I haven’t been with many and I’ve been super-discreet so far. I recon she does suspect that I’m bi because I was the one to buy the strap on that she pegs me with... Hilarious self-delusion. “super- discreet”… I suspect your right, mine knows as i told her the day we met, I think the deception is the most hurtful thing, You don’t think she might have noticed if the women’s gear you’re wearing is hers and has been moved or touched or you have some other gear stashed somewhere. It’s impossible to hide something in a house from any female. I’ve learnt that and I’m gay! As for buying the strap-on… You don’t think she might be quietly thinking - well if he likes this up his arse… From my own real-life experiences, it’s not the fact that women found out their partners were cheating with other men that made them angry, it was the fact their partners thought they were so witless they hadn’t worked something out already that made them furious. Hilarious self-delusion. " | |||
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"Doesn’t know I’m on here - despite what some know-it-alls say. I haven’t been with many and I’ve been super-discreet so far. I recon she does suspect that I’m bi because I was the one to buy the strap on that she pegs me with... Hilarious self-delusion. “super-discreet”… You don’t think she might have noticed if the women’s gear you’re wearing is hers and has been moved or touched or you have some other gear stashed somewhere. It’s impossible to hide something in a house from any female. I’ve learnt that and I’m gay! As for buying the strap-on… You don’t think she might be quietly thinking - well if he likes this up his arse… From my own real-life experiences, it’s not the fact that women found out their partners were cheating with other men that made them angry, it was the fact their partners thought they were so witless they hadn’t worked something out already that made them furious. Hilarious self-delusion. " She can quietly “think” whatever she wants. That doesn’t translate to me being on a gay site and having sex with guys. She doesn’t “know”, so she doesn’t know. My gear/dildos aren’t at home, nobody has access to my phone, I’ve never met anyone I know. She doesn’t know. | |||
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"Doesn’t know I’m on here - despite what some know-it-alls say. I haven’t been with many and I’ve been super-discreet so far. I recon she does suspect that I’m bi because I was the one to buy the strap on that she pegs me with... Hilarious self-delusion. “super-discreet”… You don’t think she might have noticed if the women’s gear you’re wearing is hers and has been moved or touched or you have some other gear stashed somewhere. It’s impossible to hide something in a house from any female. I’ve learnt that and I’m gay! As for buying the strap-on… You don’t think she might be quietly thinking - well if he likes this up his arse… From my own real-life experiences, it’s not the fact that women found out their partners were cheating with other men that made them angry, it was the fact their partners thought they were so witless they hadn’t worked something out already that made them furious. Hilarious self-delusion. She can quietly “think” whatever she wants. That doesn’t translate to me being on a gay site and having sex with guys. She doesn’t “know”, so she doesn’t know. My gear/dildos aren’t at home, nobody has access to my phone, I’ve never met anyone I know. She doesn’t know. " Ah, the difference between aetiological knowledge and aesthetic perception. All very ontological. You carry on being Secret Squirrel 🐿️, sweetheart. *as she quietly transfers assets* | |||
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"No. She's said if I ever went with another woman or man she would kick me out instantly. She hasn't done that so all those clever bastards saying of course she knows are dead wrong." And with the knowledge that her feelings on this matter were so profound and so clearly stated that it would be ruinous to your future with her, you’ve happily cheated on her anyway. What a hero. | |||
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"No. She's said if I ever went with another woman or man she would kick me out instantly. She hasn't done that so all those clever bastards saying of course she knows are dead wrong. And with the knowledge that her feelings on this matter were so profound and so clearly stated that it would be ruinous to your future with her, you’ve happily cheated on her anyway. What a hero. " Me and half the blokes on here. | |||
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"No. She's said if I ever went with another woman or man she would kick me out instantly. She hasn't done that so all those clever bastards saying of course she knows are dead wrong. And with the knowledge that her feelings on this matter were so profound and so clearly stated that it would be ruinous to your future with her, you’ve happily cheated on her anyway. What a hero. Me and half the blokes on here." Ah, the ‘they’re all doing it, so I’ll do it too” pack animal and lack of self-determination defence. Very heroic and becoming. One thing I have learnt on this site over many years now, is that some [*some*] bi men on here are so lacking in empathy for their loved-ones they are practically psychopaths. | |||
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"On mumsnet wives inspect sleeping husband’s arsehole to see if slack as fuck." Ah that’s me busted then | |||
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"On mumsnet wives inspect sleeping husband’s arsehole to see if slack as fuck." Gemini has this arsehole been penetrated? | |||
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"Of course we’re all scumbags that don’t care about anyone and deserve to be berated and dictated to by you, the Princes of Perfection. It must be an amazing feeling to know that you’ve never done anything questionable or dishonest in your lives, ever. We bow down to you. You obviously know everything about us and can read us like open books… you know everything that goes on in our lives, every pain and struggle. That strange notion that some people have commitments that can’t be reversed so need to get a few kicks elsewhere occasionally is completely outrageous to the point where you can’t simply scroll past a single thread that outlines the belief that some people can have a secret side that doesn’t actually harm anyone else. What will happen in the future, even you don’t know. What’s happening now is none of your effing business, is it?! What happened to just being nice? You have no idea what anyone else goes through." A] If you don’t want aspects of your sex life to be discussed by other people because it’s “none of their effing business”, why on earth are you contributing to a public discussion thread about this then..?! This makes you sound unhinged. Or do you only like it when everyone agrees with you and your behaviour is not questioned? B] “some people have commitments that can’t be reversed so need to get a few kicks elsewhere occasionally” is really lame beyond lame as any justification for deception and cheating. C] This huffy and ultra-defensive screed doesn’t read like someone at total ease with what they’re doing. “Never glad confident morning again"… | |||
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"Of course we’re all scumbags that don’t care about anyone and deserve to be berated and dictated to by you, the Princes of Perfection. It must be an amazing feeling to know that you’ve never done anything questionable or dishonest in your lives, ever. We bow down to you. You obviously know everything about us and can read us like open books… you know everything that goes on in our lives, every pain and struggle. That strange notion that some people have commitments that can’t be reversed so need to get a few kicks elsewhere occasionally is completely outrageous to the point where you can’t simply scroll past a single thread that outlines the belief that some people can have a secret side that doesn’t actually harm anyone else. What will happen in the future, even you don’t know. What’s happening now is none of your effing business, is it?! What happened to just being nice? You have no idea what anyone else goes through. A] If you don’t want aspects of your sex life to be discussed by other people because it’s “none of their effing business”, why on earth are you contributing to a public discussion thread about this then..?! This makes you sound unhinged. Or do you only like it when everyone agrees with you and your behaviour is not questioned? B] “some people have commitments that can’t be reversed so need to get a few kicks elsewhere occasionally” is really lame beyond lame as any justification for deception and cheating. C] This huffy and ultra-defensive screed doesn’t read like someone at total ease with what they’re doing. “Never glad confident morning again"…" Everyone loves a good troll don’t they. Nope. | |||
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"Anyone who calls someone else lame whilst simultaneously trying to act online that they know someone they’ve never met is unreal. Trolling people in a private forum where we’re all supposed to have around about the same interests is the most sad and pathetic thing I’ve seen so far. I bet you guys just love it on Facebook, don’t you?!" I don’t know you. I’ve never said I know you. I’m not pretending I know you. I’m simply reacting to what you have yourself written above about yourself. You’re not being “trolled”. What you’ve written is merely being critiqued by other users. It’s not a “private forum”. It’s a public forum open to all site users of FabGuys to comment. I don’t use Facebook or any social media as it happens. You seem TERRIBLY aerated. I must apologise. You see I saw this as a public thread to discuss the topic put forward by the OP and the contributions thereunder. I hadn’t realised you were wanting to use the thread as some sort of private and special therapy to salve your conscience over your cheating behaviour and can’t tolerate any dissenting views. A therapist would indeed be more private. | |||
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"On mumsnet wives inspect sleeping husband’s arsehole to see if slack as fuck." They probably dont, but they do check phones, bank accounts, mileage, count condoms, check diaries, listen to rumours, notice stuff you would probably not give a 2nd thought to. They're quite inquisitive. | |||
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"Of course we’re all scumbags that don’t care about anyone and deserve to be berated and dictated to by you, the Princes of Perfection. It must be an amazing feeling to know that you’ve never done anything questionable or dishonest in your lives, ever. We bow down to you. You obviously know everything about us and can read us like open books… you know everything that goes on in our lives, every pain and struggle. That strange notion that some people have commitments that can’t be reversed so need to get a few kicks elsewhere occasionally is completely outrageous to the point where you can’t simply scroll past a single thread that outlines the belief that some people can have a secret side that doesn’t actually harm anyone else. What will happen in the future, even you don’t know. What’s happening now is none of your effing business, is it?! What happened to just being nice? You have no idea what anyone else goes through." I don't think anyone called you a scumbag. I cheated on pretty much every serious partner I've ever had, including a wife. The thrill of it is quite exciting. As for whether what you do is harming anyone, only your family can answer that big question. We know the risks and we take them. | |||
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"On mumsnet wives inspect sleeping husband’s arsehole to see if slack as fuck. They probably dont, but they do check phones, bank accounts, mileage, count condoms, check diaries, listen to rumours, notice stuff you would probably not give a 2nd thought to. They're quite inquisitive. " Yes they do all that too. One lady said to gently poke the hole and if finger entered easily then be suspicious. Possibly remnants of lube too. Another said this happened, confronted her husband and he confessed. I’m going to see if I can find it, I read quite some time ago. | |||
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"On mumsnet wives inspect sleeping husband’s arsehole to see if slack as fuck. They probably dont, but they do check phones, bank accounts, mileage, count condoms, check diaries, listen to rumours, notice stuff you would probably not give a 2nd thought to. They're quite inquisitive. Yes they do all that too. One lady said to gently poke the hole and if finger entered easily then be suspicious. Possibly remnants of lube too. Another said this happened, confronted her husband and he confessed. I’m going to see if I can find it, I read quite some time ago. " Don't quite a lot of married couples do a finger up the bum as part of sex play? A slack choccie starfish is hardly a sign of Mr going full anal with Roger round the corner. | |||
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"On mumsnet wives inspect sleeping husband’s arsehole to see if slack as fuck. They probably dont, but they do check phones, bank accounts, mileage, count condoms, check diaries, listen to rumours, notice stuff you would probably not give a 2nd thought to. They're quite inquisitive. Yes they do all that too. One lady said to gently poke the hole and if finger entered easily then be suspicious. Possibly remnants of lube too. Another said this happened, confronted her husband and he confessed. I’m going to see if I can find it, I read quite some time ago. Don't quite a lot of married couples do a finger up the bum as part of sex play? A slack choccie starfish is hardly a sign of Mr going full anal with Roger round the corner." Well it’s not all negative, a couple of wives found it horny and it introduced pegging into their sex lives | |||
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"On mumsnet wives inspect sleeping husband’s arsehole to see if slack as fuck. They probably dont, but they do check phones, bank accounts, mileage, count condoms, check diaries, listen to rumours, notice stuff you would probably not give a 2nd thought to. They're quite inquisitive. Yes they do all that too. One lady said to gently poke the hole and if finger entered easily then be suspicious. Possibly remnants of lube too. Another said this happened, confronted her husband and he confessed. I’m going to see if I can find it, I read quite some time ago. Don't quite a lot of married couples do a finger up the bum as part of sex play? A slack choccie starfish is hardly a sign of Mr going full anal with Roger round the corner." It might depend *how* slack. If it was a full prolapse and he murmured unwittingly in his sleep “Fist me again, Roger round the corner!” he may have given the game away… | |||
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"Anyone who calls someone else lame whilst simultaneously trying to act online that they know someone they’ve never met is unreal. Trolling people in a private forum where we’re all supposed to have around about the same interests is the most sad and pathetic thing I’ve seen so far. I bet you guys just love it on Facebook, don’t you?! I don’t know you. I’ve never said I know you. I’m not pretending I know you. I’m simply reacting to what you have yourself written above about yourself. You’re not being “trolled”. What you’ve written is merely being critiqued by other users. It’s not a “private forum”. It’s a public forum open to all site users of FabGuys to comment. I don’t use Facebook or any social media as it happens. You seem TERRIBLY aerated. I must apologise. You see I saw this as a public thread to discuss the topic put forward by the OP and the contributions thereunder. I hadn’t realised you were wanting to use the thread as some sort of private and special therapy to salve your conscience over your cheating behaviour and can’t tolerate any dissenting views. A therapist would indeed be more private. " I’m not looking for yours or anyone else’s approval and wasn’t seeking that in the first place. It’s not inhuman to be agitated by the high and mighty claiming to know everything about everyone’s relationships. Stating that people, basically, must be scum if they’re cheating and that “ooh, your wife definitely knows” is utter clownship. But, hey… I must be the one with a problem I guess. | |||
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"Anyone who calls someone else lame whilst simultaneously trying to act online that they know someone they’ve never met is unreal. Trolling people in a private forum where we’re all supposed to have around about the same interests is the most sad and pathetic thing I’ve seen so far. I bet you guys just love it on Facebook, don’t you?! I don’t know you. I’ve never said I know you. I’m not pretending I know you. I’m simply reacting to what you have yourself written above about yourself. You’re not being “trolled”. What you’ve written is merely being critiqued by other users. It’s not a “private forum”. It’s a public forum open to all site users of FabGuys to comment. I don’t use Facebook or any social media as it happens. You seem TERRIBLY aerated. I must apologise. You see I saw this as a public thread to discuss the topic put forward by the OP and the contributions thereunder. I hadn’t realised you were wanting to use the thread as some sort of private and special therapy to salve your conscience over your cheating behaviour and can’t tolerate any dissenting views. A therapist would indeed be more private. I’m not looking for yours or anyone else’s approval and wasn’t seeking that in the first place. It’s not inhuman to be agitated by the high and mighty claiming to know everything about everyone’s relationships. Stating that people, basically, must be scum if they’re cheating and that “ooh, your wife definitely knows” is utter clownship. But, hey… I must be the one with a problem I guess." Its ok, you dont like to be challenged, you dont like a different opinion and thats ok, and you infer that having a different opinion is people thinking you're scum. Thats your language and your inference may or may not be true. Certainly not on my part as my comments have simply been about my professional experience of counselling the women (and some men) in the equation. Whenever discussion on the forum turns to this subject, it is important that balance is brought for the other side, otherwise we're just a bunch of back-slapping, cheering misogynistic and cheating wankers. There's enough delusion on this site without adding to it. | |||
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"Anyone who calls someone else lame whilst simultaneously trying to act online that they know someone they’ve never met is unreal. Trolling people in a private forum where we’re all supposed to have around about the same interests is the most sad and pathetic thing I’ve seen so far. I bet you guys just love it on Facebook, don’t you?! I don’t know you. I’ve never said I know you. I’m not pretending I know you. I’m simply reacting to what you have yourself written above about yourself. You’re not being “trolled”. What you’ve written is merely being critiqued by other users. It’s not a “private forum”. It’s a public forum open to all site users of FabGuys to comment. I don’t use Facebook or any social media as it happens. You seem TERRIBLY aerated. I must apologise. You see I saw this as a public thread to discuss the topic put forward by the OP and the contributions thereunder. I hadn’t realised you were wanting to use the thread as some sort of private and special therapy to salve your conscience over your cheating behaviour and can’t tolerate any dissenting views. A therapist would indeed be more private. I’m not looking for yours or anyone else’s approval and wasn’t seeking that in the first place. It’s not inhuman to be agitated by the high and mighty claiming to know everything about everyone’s relationships. Stating that people, basically, must be scum if they’re cheating and that “ooh, your wife definitely knows” is utter clownship. But, hey… I must be the one with a problem I guess. Its ok, you dont like to be challenged, you dont like a different opinion and thats ok, and you infer that having a different opinion is people thinking you're scum. Thats your language and your inference may or may not be true. Certainly not on my part as my comments have simply been about my professional experience of counselling the women (and some men) in the equation. Whenever discussion on the forum turns to this subject, it is important that balance is brought for the other side, otherwise we're just a bunch of back-slapping, cheering misogynistic and cheating wankers. There's enough delusion on this site without adding to it. " Well, finally a comment that makes sense at last. Do you get many couples to you for counselling that have an amazing relationship? Probably not. I deduct from that, that your VAST experience is based on the relationships that have broken down due to mistrust and therefore that is all you have seen. Kind of like going to an orange convention to carry out a survey on whether the people there like oranges. That survey would be a little skewed. I’m not saying what some people do is right, or justified but, they don’t always hurt other people and it IS possible to be discreet. Perspective has to play a part also, you probably earn a lot of money per hour doing what you do - a lot of people might be jarred and critical, wondering why you can get away with earning so much for talking. We all do the things we do and that’s just how it is, live and let live I say. | |||
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"Anyone who calls someone else lame whilst simultaneously trying to act online that they know someone they’ve never met is unreal. Trolling people in a private forum where we’re all supposed to have around about the same interests is the most sad and pathetic thing I’ve seen so far. I bet you guys just love it on Facebook, don’t you?! I don’t know you. I’ve never said I know you. I’m not pretending I know you. I’m simply reacting to what you have yourself written above about yourself. You’re not being “trolled”. What you’ve written is merely being critiqued by other users. It’s not a “private forum”. It’s a public forum open to all site users of FabGuys to comment. I don’t use Facebook or any social media as it happens. You seem TERRIBLY aerated. I must apologise. You see I saw this as a public thread to discuss the topic put forward by the OP and the contributions thereunder. I hadn’t realised you were wanting to use the thread as some sort of private and special therapy to salve your conscience over your cheating behaviour and can’t tolerate any dissenting views. A therapist would indeed be more private. I’m not looking for yours or anyone else’s approval and wasn’t seeking that in the first place. It’s not inhuman to be agitated by the high and mighty claiming to know everything about everyone’s relationships. Stating that people, basically, must be scum if they’re cheating and that “ooh, your wife definitely knows” is utter clownship. But, hey… I must be the one with a problem I guess. Its ok, you dont like to be challenged, you dont like a different opinion and thats ok, and you infer that having a different opinion is people thinking you're scum. Thats your language and your inference may or may not be true. Certainly not on my part as my comments have simply been about my professional experience of counselling the women (and some men) in the equation. Whenever discussion on the forum turns to this subject, it is important that balance is brought for the other side, otherwise we're just a bunch of back-slapping, cheering misogynistic and cheating wankers. There's enough delusion on this site without adding to it. Well, finally a comment that makes sense at last. Do you get many couples to you for counselling that have an amazing relationship? Probably not. I deduct from that, that your VAST experience is based on the relationships that have broken down due to mistrust and therefore that is all you have seen. Kind of like going to an orange convention to carry out a survey on whether the people there like oranges. That survey would be a little skewed. I’m not saying what some people do is right, or justified but, they don’t always hurt other people and it IS possible to be discreet. Perspective has to play a part also, you probably earn a lot of money per hour doing what you do - a lot of people might be jarred and critical, wondering why you can get away with earning so much for talking. We all do the things we do and that’s just how it is, live and let live I say." I dont do therapy anymore, and I never did couples or relationships therapy, my 'niche' was emergeny trauma and talking through any trauma often uncovers all trauma the person is experiencing not just thenone that brought them to me. But yes, I had clients who had seemingly happy relationships. Some quite sickeningly perfect. Whether someone in the relationship was playing away, I dont know, but honestly, the amount of times I'd listen to women say "does he think I'm stupid" and "the sex doesn't matter, the lying to my face does" was alarming and a real eye opener for me. | |||
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"Anyone who calls someone else lame whilst simultaneously trying to act online that they know someone they’ve never met is unreal. Trolling people in a private forum where we’re all supposed to have around about the same interests is the most sad and pathetic thing I’ve seen so far. I bet you guys just love it on Facebook, don’t you?! I don’t know you. I’ve never said I know you. I’m not pretending I know you. I’m simply reacting to what you have yourself written above about yourself. You’re not being “trolled”. What you’ve written is merely being critiqued by other users. It’s not a “private forum”. It’s a public forum open to all site users of FabGuys to comment. I don’t use Facebook or any social media as it happens. You seem TERRIBLY aerated. I must apologise. You see I saw this as a public thread to discuss the topic put forward by the OP and the contributions thereunder. I hadn’t realised you were wanting to use the thread as some sort of private and special therapy to salve your conscience over your cheating behaviour and can’t tolerate any dissenting views. A therapist would indeed be more private. I’m not looking for yours or anyone else’s approval and wasn’t seeking that in the first place. It’s not inhuman to be agitated by the high and mighty claiming to know everything about everyone’s relationships. Stating that people, basically, must be scum if they’re cheating and that “ooh, your wife definitely knows” is utter clownship. But, hey… I must be the one with a problem I guess. Its ok, you dont like to be challenged, you dont like a different opinion and thats ok, and you infer that having a different opinion is people thinking you're scum. Thats your language and your inference may or may not be true. Certainly not on my part as my comments have simply been about my professional experience of counselling the women (and some men) in the equation. Whenever discussion on the forum turns to this subject, it is important that balance is brought for the other side, otherwise we're just a bunch of back-slapping, cheering misogynistic and cheating wankers. There's enough delusion on this site without adding to it. Well, finally a comment that makes sense at last. Do you get many couples to you for counselling that have an amazing relationship? Probably not. I deduct from that, that your VAST experience is based on the relationships that have broken down due to mistrust and therefore that is all you have seen. Kind of like going to an orange convention to carry out a survey on whether the people there like oranges. That survey would be a little skewed. I’m not saying what some people do is right, or justified but, they don’t always hurt other people and it IS possible to be discreet. Perspective has to play a part also, you probably earn a lot of money per hour doing what you do - a lot of people might be jarred and critical, wondering why you can get away with earning so much for talking. We all do the things we do and that’s just how it is, live and let live I say. I dont do therapy anymore, and I never did couples or relationships therapy, my 'niche' was emergeny trauma and talking through any trauma often uncovers all trauma the person is experiencing not just thenone that brought them to me. But yes, I had clients who had seemingly happy relationships. Some quite sickeningly perfect. Whether someone in the relationship was playing away, I dont know, but honestly, the amount of times I'd listen to women say "does he think I'm stupid" and "the sex doesn't matter, the lying to my face does" was alarming and a real eye opener for me. " Fair enough. However, that doesn’t mean that all women being cheated on know they’re being cheated on. It also doesn’t mean all cheats are scum (may not have been implied by you, but has in this thread). | |||
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"I stand by my comment that if a woman's partner is getting sex elsewhere, unless she is an imbecile, she will know pretty damn quickly. Thinking you have got away with it because she hasn't screamed in your face is where it starts falling apart for most men because complacency starts setting in and men are generally a bit stupid when it comes to covering tracks. I would also say a significant percentage of women turn a blind eye for financial stability reasons." The cum farts normally give it away | |||
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"I stand by my comment that if a woman's partner is getting sex elsewhere, unless she is an imbecile, she will know pretty damn quickly. Thinking you have got away with it because she hasn't screamed in your face is where it starts falling apart for most men because complacency starts setting in and men are generally a bit stupid when it comes to covering tracks. I would also say a significant percentage of women turn a blind eye for financial stability reasons." That’s a fair stance for you to take but, I stand by mine. A lot of industries that require secrecy and strategic deception, in my experience, are male-dominated and have been for a long time. I know exactly who you’re talking about but, that isn’t me. Certainly isn’t all men. | |||
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"… A lot of industries that require secrecy and strategic deception, in my experience, are male-dominated and have been for a long time… " Perhaps the most interestingly misogynistic comment amongst many in the thread. | |||
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"… A lot of industries that require secrecy and strategic deception, in my experience, are male-dominated and have been for a long time… Perhaps the most interestingly misogynistic comment amongst many in the thread. " I know - Dame Judi Dench was head of MI6 | |||
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"…I’m not looking for yours or anyone else’s approval and wasn’t seeking that in the first place. It’s not inhuman to be agitated by the high and mighty claiming to know everything about everyone’s relationships. Stating that people, basically, must be scum if they’re cheating and that “ooh, your wife definitely knows” is utter clownship. But, hey… I must be the one with a problem I guess..." I wasn’t imagining you were seeking some approval. It would be beyond weird if you had contributed to the thread on that basis. Nobody has stated that you are “scum”. Only you have introduced that word. Which a psychologist would point out tells you more about your own subconscious thinking of what you’re doing than anyone else’s. I’m not aware that anyone is trying to be “high and mighty” or claiming that they “know everything about everyone’s relationships”. All that we know is what you have voluntarily disclosed yourself. I repeat - what you have voluntarily disclosed yourself. That your wife does not know you have sex with men; you are cheating on her; this does but worry you; you are confident she is ignorant. You seem frustrated and almost belligerent that some other users might critique that. If you didn’t want your behaviour analysed or judged by anyone, it seems strange that you volunteered it in an open thread about having sex behind a wife’s back. Another user with some very pertinent experience - both personal as he has admitted he has cheated, as well as professional counselling experiences - has given us good insight into how often men haven’t been as successful as they think in believing they are free from suspicion of sexual fidelity. This is my own experience too: deception kills relationships, not sexual infidelity itself. | |||
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