"Would love to hear other lads stories about times they ended up getting fun with strangers, totally out of the blue, unplanned. "
Not with men yet sadly. Though I'd love to be picked up or pick a guy up spontaneously out of the blue when it's not expected.
Though once back in the early 80s I was single and I had travelled over to a family wedding do at a posh golf club near London and was getting myself a drink at the bar and started chatting to a nice looking young girl of 17 or 18 (I was 20 at the time) who was also waiting for a drink.
The attraction seemed to be mutual and while I'm usually pretty slow to pick up on these things, it was obvious she was interested by the way she pressed up to me. And even though the bar was crowded it was overly friendly.
I had had a few, so Dutch courage must have kicked in & I asked if she wanted to go outside for a 'wee talk'.
She was almost pulling me away before I'd finished the question.
We slipped out unnoticed and found some entry or alley in the grounds of the clubhouse and immediately started eating the face of each other.
We hadn't even exchanged names yet.
It very soon devolved into her turning round, panties off, face towards the wall, arse out while I pumped her doggystyle very hard and fast.
I was in one of my many long droughts back then so didn't last long at all before spunking up into her without thinking of the consequences.
She was far from objecting so I assumed she had precautions in hand.
After I finished, and I don't think she was overly impressed with my performance tbh, she quickly fussed about making sure her outfit and skirt wasn't ruined and tried to fix the ridiculous 80s hair do she had and then we both went back to the function room.
We snuck in and immediately she frantically whispered to me, "Oh shit, there's my mum and dad" and I looked over to where she was indicating to see an older couple who i had been introduced to earlier that day when I arrived, chatting happily away to my Mum and Dad!
And why not? My English born dad hadn't seen his younger brother in years!
Yes I was fucking my cousin. I had no idea.
I'd never even given the matter any thought.
Yes, there were plenty of my English relatives there who i hadn't seen for decades if at all - it was my dad's sisters son's wedding - but it was a big do and there were just as many, if not more, from the brides side.
And asking potential sexual partners for their birth certificates in my horny, sexually frustrated 20 year old state, wasn't top of my agenda.
She, of course, knew exactly I was.
The Belfast accent would have been a giveaway for a start.
So I was ensnared by this wanton hussy of a relation.
And I wasnt complaining.
In fact I didn't give a fuck.
Not even to the fact that I blew my load inside her.
A fact which gave me momentary shivers of horror weeks later when I was safely back in dear old Ulster and finally realised what the result might be. But I quickly forgot that too.
I've never met her again.
She'd be about 60 or so now and i bet shes still a dirty sexy bitch and I probably would again.
I heard many years later from my sister that she had quite the reputation anyway.
It was quite embarrassing when we were "formally" introduced by our parents a few minutes after arriving back.
"B****, you've met S****** have you?" my Uncle said.
I mumbled something about "Yes, I bumped into her at the bar a little while earlier" or something and she just smiled neutrally at me and I at her.
We never spoke or were in each others company the rest of the night - or ever.
She had seemingly lost interest in me after getting what she wanted.
And I was just chuffed to have got my hole again at long last. |
