"Intimacy? That is rare in transactional sex. We can all be seduced by the lack of responsibility and connection that comes with transactional/sport sex. It is clear when a profile states..I only want X, or I will only meet X. We dpersonalise and dehumanise each other with photos of torsos, cocks, arses, we hide faces, dismembering what makes us unique humans, our faces and expressions. The roots of this expression of fucked up masculinity lie in internalised homophobia, fear, and guilt.
That said, it is still possible to find authentic connections, even on FabGuys!
So dont give up hope,  "
I agree and disagree with these statements.
Partly because of the personal situations and age group/demographic of guys on here, intimacy is certainly a bit less common - IMO, largely due to what you said about internalised homophobia, societal expectations, past trauma from growing up in negative environments, fear, guilt etc.
But, on other platforms where the demographic is different the theme of transactional sex remains the same. And that's largely because (in my opinion) of gay culture. Men who have sex with men - the public opinion was for a long time that it was dirty, immoral, a sin , an abomination.... Illegal
So sex was secretive, fleeting and just served the purpose of cuming and meeting that sexual need.
And there's nothing wrong with meeting that sexual need and depersonalising sex. It's not unique to men, or women or to straight, bi , gay etc.
But, I firmly believe that many guys do not know the difference from their intimacy and sexual need. And they can fuck 100 men or women and not actually scratch the itch that they have, which his intimacy. They don't recognise it as a need. Particularly the guys who say they don't have sex with wife because she's lost all interest. How are they having their intimacy needs met ?.
I don't think many of them could actually allow themselves to enjoy the intimacy of sex with a man tbh for the reasons and culture mentioned above.
And of course, many of us do have our intimacy needs met in other ways and don't need it or enjoy it
When it's involved in sex with strangers.
Sex with a connection and intimacy is amazing though. It's definitely the superior experience even if it's NSA. But, we all have our preferences I suppose. I feel like many guys don't know what they're missing or they're afraid to try it. |
