FabGuys.com: Heather (68) , TV/TS in Frome, South West, UK

I just had a photo rejected by the mods because I wasn't in the photo. Let me elaborate, the pic was of a home STI testing kit. I was posting it to try and illustrate how easy it is to do a home test. No embarrassing waiting rooms with everyone avoiding eye contact (been there, done that!), just a simple test you do at home, it's even freepost to return the test. Check out SH.UK.

Sorry moderators but I thought that quite important.......

Never mind the politically correct stuff, I'm a tranny and proud to be called that! I read online that the "slur" word "transvestite" has largely been replaced by "cross dresser" but that, to me, refers more to the likes of panty wearers who possibly don't do makeup or even a wig, that's fine if that's what floats their boat, live and let live. Most transvestites want to create the whole image as accurately as possible. I can understand a TS being offended at being called a tranny because theirs is a complete lifestyle change but I'm sick of being told we can't use the word transvestite any more, it's what I am, leave me alone!

I don't like facial or body hair. I don't want to be repetitive but NO BEARDS! Ok? Got that? And if you send me a pic of a hairy groin you can guarantee you won't be getting a reply!

I am always totally smooth and take a pride in my finely plucked eyebrows. I have one tattoo, my tramp stamp or bitch badge. The funny thing is I didn't even know they were called tramp stamps until after I had got it but, too late, I'm branded a tramp now for all to see! I'm sub, I have gone top a few times and I have to say I really enjoyed it but I'm much more suited to the sub role.

I'm a 100% convincing tranny, when anybody sees me they say "I'm convinced that's a tranny!"

I don't "dress up", I dress.

As a vegan, the only meat that goes in my mouth is very much alive!

Oh, and no face pic, no meet! If I receive a message and there is no face pic on the profile or message then I will just ignore it, and if I do get any then it will prove they haven't read this profile!

One line messages such as "How's you?" will simply be ignored.

I've just submitted my latest video to xhamster and I got a message saying it will appear after it has been checked and verified........wait a minute, does that mean it is somebody's job to sit and watch porn, and get paid for it? Where do I sign?!!

A friend has asked if I would post any more accounts of my true adventures, so, at the risk of upsetting those that think my profile is too long, here goes.

Many years ago a good mate of mine at work was about to turn 40 but he didn't want to admit it and was trying to keep it quiet. So much so that he went on a foreign holiday (remember those days?) for the period of his birthday. This was the week before Christmas and he was due to return on the morning of the work's party which started at lunchtime. A few of us were trying to think of something to mark the event and as he was instrumental in organising a strippergram (remember those days?) for me when I was getting married we thought it appropriate he should get a taste of his own medicine. But we didn't want to get him one he'd enjoy so we looked for a trannygram. Nobody offered one so I suggested I would do it (oh well, if I must!). The day came and around 180 colleagues turned up at the large hotel and conference centre at midday. My mate had almost literally come straight from the airport. We all had our meal and then I sneaked off to get changed in a hotel room the reception staff had kindly arranged. The plan was for two of the girls from the office to sit on his lap whilst two guys handcuffed him to his chair. In the meantime I had changed into a black leather miniskirt, fishnet body, fishnet stockings and suspenders, long false nails and a very blonde wig. I had some five inch heel stilettos and carried a big black whip. I left the hotel room and headed for the conference centre where everything was going to plan. Now, to get to the party I had to cross the big reception area but half way across I got a bout of cramp in my calf due to the heels so i stopped, leant against a wall and took one shoe off to try to coax the muscle back to life. Just as I did so the receptionists spotted me and shouted "hey, the police are here you know!" Two officers were seated in reception taking a statement from someone. I guess "rabbit in the headlight" would be the best way to describe me right then, leaning against a wall, leg up with shoe off and whip in hand, looking very guilty. It all screamed "prostitute!" much to the amusement of the reception staff. I quickly put my shoe back on and tottered on my way. I made a grand entrance to "Addicted to Love" and proceeded to inflict all sort of BDSM techniques. Fair play to my mate though, halfway through he said "I'm getting hard!" The best Christmas do ever!

Ok, my latest adventure (misadventure?), this is from July 2022. My friends, mostly female, were going to an 80s night at a local venue and they were trying to get me to go but I said no. In the end I foolishly said I'd go if I could go as Madonna. They took me up on it! I put together the white outfit in my pics from July 22 and headed out. I had warned my neighbour in the next flat beforehand and she said she'd like to see me before I went so I knocked on her door. She was in awe! She even walked me to my car as we are on a cobbled street and I was in five inch heels, she is around 80 btw! I drove to a friend's house to pick up the girls and off we went to the party.I have to say how pleased I was at the reception I got from both men and women, it was fabulous! I was particularly pleased by the way staight guys weren't afraid to come onto me, openly saying they'd like to have sex with me. Now, here's the interesting bit, occasionally I'd go outside to cool down and every time I did, young girls would come up to me and were interested in my sexuality and seemed to be getting off on me hinting at being genderfluid. Now one totally gorgeous girl in her early twenties showed more than a passing interest and soon we were kissing and she kept telling me I was "fucking gorgeous" but then she said "I think you're fucking gorgeous and if anyone insults you I'll fucking stab them with my penknife in my handbag, I've done it a few times before". At this point she starts rummaging in her bag......Jeeeeesusssss! She's going to pull a blade!!! But then pulls out her lighter! New knickers please, I've just wet these! Luckily I then spotted a friend and I mouthed the word "Help!" to him and he came and took me by the hand to the dance floor. Phew!

I'm currently a little amazed, if not to say wound up, over an event a couple of days back. I was looking for a meet with another girl but a guy messaged saying he could accom so I agreed to travel there to see him. He gave me his postcode but nothing more and said I would have to text him when I was on the way for directions. When I said I couldn't do that (I'm not stopping to text at 11:30pm fully dressed!) he replied with "you will have trouble finding it then". After several more messages, each receiving equally ignorant one line replies, I asked if he really wanted to go ahead with the meet and he just logged off! Well it was your loss "mightymouse123456" you would have had a randy tgirl come to your home dressed in a short tight dress, stockings and suspenders and six inch heels ready for anything. All it would have taken was a bit of courtesy and to type a few words!

I had a bit of a disasterous journey recently, I travelled all the way to Liverpool for a meet that didn't happen through nobody's fault. I was a little nervous at travelling to Liverpool city centre fully dressed and in full make up but the worst bit was when I got to the pay barrier at the Mersey tunnel. I threw two pounds in but the barrier didn't raise. I pushed the button to call for assistance, assuming it was just an intercom, but oh no, it set off a big flashing beacon and the man in the box headed over to help. He came to the car window as I was desperately trying to pull the hem of my dress down to cover my suspenders, unsuccessfully I may add! I could have died. He then partially dismantled the machine as I sat there cringing. In the end he pressed a button to let me through but, of course, I couldn't just drive quietly away, nope, because the machine showed that I hadn't paid, a huge siren went off as I tried to discreetly disappear into the night! I realised later I'd put [hidden] in not £2.00, oops! Perhaps it was down to the blonde wig I was wearing?!

I went out a few days ago to meet a guy at a Chester hotel. He told me we could get in through the door from the car park to avoid reception. What he failed to tell me was I couldn't park in the car park as he didn't have a pass and had to park two streets away. Two cobbled streets, in six inch heels, past restaurants and pubs. And then, to top it all, the receptionist was having a cig at the back door and even held it open for me. So much for sneaking in! In actual fact though I found it a huge turn-on to be out in public in a very short dress, stockings and over-the-knee boots, clearly heading to a guy's room for sex. You can see what happened later in my pics, the one of me sitting on the Premier Inn bed in my black dress and one of me sucking cock on my knees in black lingerie.

It seems I need to make it clear what I am looking for.

Firstly, little or no body or facial hair.

Secondly, some reasonably intelligent conversation would be nice. For starters please make any introductory message more than just something like "wanna fuck?". I'm not expecting a Wordsworth or Keats but please put a little more effort into it! One message I received recently just consisted of "id fuck u xxx", whilst I appreciate the sentiment I could never indulge in a sexual relationship with someone who can't master the use of a capital letter or an apostrophe!

The only watersport I'm interested in is surfing!

I don't use condoms because I love to feel a bare cock spurting inside me. Nothing excites me more than feeling a bare cock pushing against my hole, and then that sweet moment when it enters me. So, if we have sex, I will expect you to fuck me bareback and cum deep inside me.

And lastly, if your profile pic is a penis, stroll on!

Ok, late entry, anybody with photos of themselves with stupid Snapchat ears, glasses, eyebrows or anything needn't bother either. I may just be a grouchy bitch but they really get my goat!

Am I asking too much? Maybe I'm being a bit of a prima donna, I don't know.

If I am meeting a tgirl then they have to be the full deal, smooth, fully made up and nicely dressed. No HPWs sorry. Just throwing on some heels and a dress won't cut it with me, it is the rest of the process that is important in my book. It takes me around two hours to get into femme mode and I'm not interested in meeting anyone that can be ready in much less than that. And don't ever, ever ask to borrow my makeup.

I'm always in a bit of a quandary to know how to class myself on this profile, gay or bisexual? Now if I say I'm gay is that based on my female persona which means I'm a lesbian which I'm happy to go with, but it may mean I'm a guy who just likes other guys........? On the other hand, if I put bisexual that means I like men and women. So, actually, gay describes me better but only if I'm a woman, does that make sense?! The fact that I can't remember the last time I had sex with someone that didn't have a penis should really define my orientation!

I used to think it odd to receive messages from men that are listed as straight but, thinking about it, I can understand. I guess they aren't attracted to men but they like the female appearance of a TV and find the thought of "naughty" sex appealing. Nothing wrong with that! In fact, most guys that have fucked me are straight. I'm the one that's gay!

When I'm in male mode I don't find men at all attractive but I love TVs, when I'm dressed I still find trannies equally attractive but I also get very excited at the thought of pleasuring men. Making a guy cum, through whatever means, is the most thrilling feeling I know.

Legal Notice: Anyone who wants to wank over my pictures please feel free to do so, it's what they are there for!

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