This is a mostly true story with a little embellishment
I was embarrassed and felt humiliated.
Id been at my wifes friend Kathryns house for a brew and when they'd left the living room to put the kettle on i noticed a magazine or pamphlet peeking out from under a cushion on the settee that had obviously been stuffed there and forgotten. I pulled it out and to my amusement and delight it turned out to be an Anne Summers catalogue. I must have idly started turning the pages and was stood there when Kathryn returned to the room with brews in hand. She saw what i was looking at and as she put the mugs down she then stepped to me and grabbed it from my hands. She went really red faced and looked furious, a mix of embarrassment and annoyance i guess.
Looking at the pages that were open when she grabbed the magazine from my hand she saw plus size models in fetish clothes. Kathryn is a larger girl and she just whispered "where you thinking of me dressed like that?"
I said no, id just picked it up out of curiosity and was sorry if id embarrassed her, assuming that would be the end of it
It wasnt. She sat down and told me to sit as well and she stared at the page intently. She said "your wife is smaller than me, so if it wasnt for her and you said it wasnt for me, that must mean it was for you maybe ?"
I am a chubby bloke, no point denying it and i did at the time have fantasies of cross dressing i hadn't at that time explored but would do years after. Kathryn had known me since i was at uni with her and my wife and added
"You admitted you once had been with a man at uni to me years ago, is that it, you want to dress like a woman?"
She opened the page and held it to me, pointing out a chubby woman in a really cheap looking bondage style dress.
" Like her? You want to be like her?"
Ironically, i probably would love to but i said no, i was just flicking and being nosey and apologized again.
I realised Kathryn was embarrassed and hugely redirecting her unneeded guilt in my direction. I am hugely submissive anyway and have always been excited by authoritative women and men and i pretty much deferred to her rather than saying that this was a silly overreaction.
She became more conciliatory now, more confident, telling me she was worried about me and my marriage. She explained that she felt she should tell my wife but couldnt do that to me and her.
Thats when what had been mostly carry on type silliness escalated.
"I know a guy you should talk to, he goes to our pub quiz, hes a sort of counsellor or therapist. He mentions he talks to and listens to men with marriage problems and kinks and things. Now, ignoring immediately the huge problem with confidentiality that screamed at me instantly i was just nodding and hoping this rambling would end.
It did, but not how i expected. It ended with Kathryn getting her mobile phone out and texting furiously for a minute or so before saying it was ok, smiling and saying that she was sorry for getting upset. Brews got d*unk and although things were awkward it felt less weird, Kathryn directed conversation to more mundane stuff and about 10 minutes later i got up to leave. A little hug, a peck on the cheek and then Kathryn quietly said
"When he gets in touch, just talk ok? Ill feel happier and ill not be thinking about mentioning it to your wife anymore".
Those words freaked me out massively.
As i walked to the car ominously the phone began to ring, Kathryn could still see me so i answered and to my horror i heard the following
"Hi, this is Gaz, Kathryn thought you and i should have a chat. "
I cant remember the phone conversation but there felt like a little bit of an implied threat. Meet Gaz to talk or Kathryn would be talking to my wife and spinning a story about her husband's cross dressing in kinky outfits fetish thoughts
The irony is that these days id bloody love to do just that and when i have been happiest cross dressing its as a sissy, a maid or a slut, but at the tine that was largely unknown territory to me
So, inevitably i agreed to meet Gaz, about two days later visiting him at his house/ office on my way back from work. He was actually very professional and understanding, accepting that i was just being nosey and lacking any assertiveness to laugh off the situation and to correct Kathryn's guilty ramble.
I sat across from him and after about 5 minutes i felt we had done, i felt reassured and safer, he said he would straighten it up with Kathryn and make her see what had happened in the correct light and that would be that
I felt it was time to go and was just about to stand up when Gaz said
"Kathryn told me yould been with a man at uni, would you tell me about that?"
I was a bit surprised but i felt like a bit of a weight had been taken off my chest and i blurted out about how id been curious and rather prone to risk taking and had hung around near the bus station toilets late to night once leading to a very sleazy but successful experience. He asked me about it and i admitted id been turned on by the risk, the sense of shame and submission and had ended up on my knees sicking cock in a toilet cubicle.
Gaz seemed pleased id shared. He did mention our meeting was definitely over and we wouldnt have any follow up but then we told me when hed been a bit younger he used to hang around the mens toilet in the nearby park and would sometimes meet men. He was very upfront and said hed never be the sort to be knelt sucking cock but that he loved being sucked and hadn't had a blow job in ages. The implication was clear
"Do you want what i want?" He asked
I nodded, my mouth felt dry,i felt dizzy but also realised i was suddenly getting hard.
"Even if you dont wear slutty girls clothes do you want to suck a cock today? My cock?"
I said yes, he replied "yes..... "
I added yes Gaz, i want to suck your cock.
"Not in my office, in the hall" he announced and got up and led me into the hallway where he stood in the way of the front door, a solid wooden door with no glass in it fortunately and told me to kneel in front of him
I did, of course i did, i needed to please him but i also needed to give on to my growing submissive lust.
He unbuckled his belt, unzipped himself and placed his hand on his growing erection. He didnt need to say anything, i knew i needed to worship his cock, but he did anyway
"Come here you slut"
I was hungry to worship, i greedily licked his hardening shaft and cupped and licked his balls which felt heavy and harder than id expected. I pulled his cock into my mouth and in my desire forced him back so he was stood pushed against the front door and began long strokes up and down his shaft, spitting to make drool and tantalizing him with drooly lengths as i looked up at him but pulled my face away from his shaft. He was so turned on, so excited, he pushed my head back down and used one hand to force me further onto his cock whilst his other gand steadied himself against the door as our motions were causing him to bang on the door furnishings and the letter box was clanging in response. I wonder what the neighbors would think the sound was ?
It was very intense, at the time it had been a long gap between cock sucking sessions for me and i think him as well. I was channelling my inner slut and loving it and he was quickly moaning, grunting and i could taste the difference as his pre cum built up and oozed between my lips.
When he came it was powerful, his whole body shuddered, hos right leg in particular shaking like a tree in a storm and he grunted and, it turned out, bit his own lip to stop himself shouting as he exploded in my mouth. I dont know how long it has been since he had last cum but it felt like a huge load and i struggled to keep from gagging and spitting or coughing up cum on him or the floor at his feet.
I breathed in deeply and steadied myself and swallowed in big gulps. It felt so good, it felt right to be slutty cock sucking bitch in that moment
Gaz alternated between muttering "dirty slut, bitch, good boy " and " oh god, oh god" before awkwardly beginning to zip himself up and belt his trousers again. He was red faced and both excited and clearly nervous. I imagine his head was full of oh god what have i done and how fucked am i professionally.
But it was fine. We both liked what we had done, i revelled in feeling like a whore and he had cum in a willing mouth.
I felt quite elated, a mix of a subspace and a sense of satisfaction and arousal.
I left very quickly, i took time to make sure he was ok and he promised the call to Kathryn would sort it all out. He asked me about ten times was i ok, i think his nerves must have been hugely on each. I reassured him everything was fine, more than fine actually.
We agreed we wouldnt see each other again and in the nearly twenty years since we havent. Kathryn and i were fine, she never brought the catalogue up again other than once saying " sorry about all that that day" whilst having a meal with me, her husband and my wife at a pub when she and i went to order food from the bar. It has never resurfaced.
The irony is of course now i crave cross dressing and cock sucking,maybe things would be better and brighter if things had been outed but its impossible to say. I still think of that meeting,my only one, with a therapist or counselor and the day i gave in to my inner slut and pushed a man up against the inside of his front door so i could swallow his cum and get what we both needed.
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