FabGuys.com forum: Limericks

By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

Your own please! Here's my finest:

There was a young fella from Blackwood,

Whose boyfriend initially lacked wood.

After much skilled fellatio

His hard-to-soft ratio

Improved till 'twas more than his crack stood

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By *aremanMan
6 weeks ago

Hingham

I know that he's probably pissed

But he's a stud not to be missed

So I need to know...

To make his cock grow

Should I submit or resist?

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

Whilst browsing the guys who are fab

One wonders, a slip or a slab?

A twinky wee fella

Or maybe a hell of

A hunk, my anus to stab

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By *cr MannixMan
6 weeks ago

Manchester

There was a young lad from Kew

Who said as the Bishop withdrew

The Vicar is thicker and slicker and quicker

And four inches longer than you

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By *eorge LooneyMan
6 weeks ago

Wokingham

There once was a gay man from stoke

Who loved to shag bloke after bloke

He was so full of cum

It flowed out past the gum

His poke was certainly no joke

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By *hebestrimmerMan
Forum Mod
6 weeks ago

Sth Elmsall

When I lived in Goole, I used to toss off on a stool, my brother said lad tha'll make thi sen bad, I said knackers and piss off to school!

I knew a young man from Rangoon, he was born 6 months too soon, he had not the luck to be gained by F@@k but a tossoff shoved in with a spoon.

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By *ruemaleMan
6 weeks ago

notts

There was a young man called Dave sprocket

Who went up to space in a rocket

The rocket went bang

His balls went clang

And his knob landed up in his pocket

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By *ruemaleMan
6 weeks ago

notts

There was a young woman from hitchin

Who was scratching her cunt in the kitchen

Her mother said rose

It's the crabs I suppose

She said yes and the buggers are itchin

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By *suckcocks666Man
6 weeks ago

Birstall

I know a young man who's a slob,

And he has a very large knob,

He gave me a look,

I said oh yes please, fuck,

So he did in my arse and my gob 😎

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By *ucksitupMan
6 weeks ago

Shrewsbury

There was a young lady from Bude

Who went for a swim in the nude

A man in a punt

Stuck his pole in the water

And said you can’t swim here it’s private

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By *ucksitupMan
6 weeks ago

Shrewsbury

There was a young lady from Ealing

Who had a peculiar feeling

She lay on her back

And opened her crack

And pissed all over the ceiling

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By *starMan
6 weeks ago

Stroud

A plumber I happened to see

As he plumbed a young lad by a tree

Said the boy "please stop plumbing

I hear someone coming"

Said that plumber, still plumbing, "it's me!"

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS
6 weeks ago

Bristol

I knew a young lad named Roy

In truth he was such a dirty boy

He liked to get fucked

Up his tight little butt

And squealed with pleasure and joy

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By *alking HeadMan
6 weeks ago

Bolton

Not a limerick but....

Mary had a little skirt

It was slit right up the sides

And every time she wore that skirt

The boys could see her thighs

Mary had another skirt It was slit right up the front....

But she never wore that one.

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By *iBobOxonMan
6 weeks ago

Thame/Aylesbury

There was a young man who I’ve heard

Had learned how to fly like a bird

In front of thousands of people, he leapt from the steeple,

And was buried on April the 3rd.

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By *omyorksMan
6 weeks ago

Nr York

Nymphomaniacal Jill,

Used a dynamite stick for a thrill

They found her vagina

In North Carolina

And bits of her tits in Brazil

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By *iBobOxonMan
6 weeks ago

Thame/Aylesbury

The boy stood on the burning deck, eating red hot scallops

One fell down his trouser leg and burnt his ankle.

Completely missed his bollocks.

Not technically a limerick, but has made me smile since the 70s.

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By *DAnnetteTV/TS
6 weeks ago

Daventry

My favourite part of foreplay,

Is when I strip to my silk lingerie,

His tongue it then flicks

Inside my knix

And I let him rim me all day

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By *cr MannixMan
6 weeks ago

Manchester

There was a young vicar called Bings

Who talked of religion and things

But his secret desire

Was a lad in the choir

With a bottom like jelly on springs

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

While striding the decks singing shanties

The sailors called "show off yer scanties"

The twink cabin boy

Was a willing toy

Seamens' semen all over his panties

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

One day a dour fellow called negs

Quite opposed to the stocking-clad legs

Of CDs and sissies,

Transexual missies

Said "I'm only turned on by men's kegs"

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

Oh fabguys webmasters we pray

We've got no forum round our way

West Midlands and Devon

Would be gay lad heaven

If only we'd our own place to play

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By *ilthy tracy300Man
6 weeks ago

lancashire

Finish this yourself, ...there was a young man from Nantucket.,.

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By *obbleTV/TS
6 weeks ago

manchester

Mary had a little pig She could not stop it gruntin she took it down a country lane and told it off.

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

"Finish this yourself, ...there was a young man from Nantucket.,."

Who oft said "I'm wanking, aw fuck it"

His face quickly whitened

As his bollocks tightened

And his cum totally filled a bucket

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

I know a gal here, Missy Crystals

I'm avid to spunk on her bristols

If I say "I'm so keen,

God save you my queen"

Could I be one of your Sex Pistols?

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By *arridMan
6 weeks ago

Brighton

A shopper called Cdstefi, quite deftly,

Chose dresses both stylish and hefty.

With silks soft and fine,

And shoes all divine,

She dazzled the crowd most effectively.

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By *hiteroseMan
6 weeks ago

Neverwhere

A guy from Brighton called Marrid

Liked his sex, steamy and sordid

But he doesn't like yukky

Or anything mucky

But loves a fucking from Hagrid.

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By *ichelle-hantsTV/TS
6 weeks ago

Hayling island, Hants

A lovely young lady from Bude

Used to dance on the stage in the nude

A man at the front stood up and yelled Cunt!

Just like that,

right out loud

Bloody rude

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By *ammy39Man
6 weeks ago

Glenrothes

There was a young lad from East Cheam

Who invented a wanking machine

On the 99th stroke

the fuckin thing broke

and whipped both his balls into cream

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

In ancient times a glimpse of stocking

Was regarded as really quite shocking

Now it's all on show

And any old bro

Can see a hole to put their cock in

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By *obbleTV/TS
6 weeks ago

manchester

Did you hear about the perverted bell ringer?. The vicar went in and Tolled him off.

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By *ruemaleMan
6 weeks ago

notts

There is a site called fabguys

Where fun could be got if your wise

To avoid the fake tossers

And other chance prossers

Make sure that you open your eyes

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By *obbleTV/TS
6 weeks ago

manchester

Under the village chestnut tree, the village idiot sat, passing the time abusing himself, and catching the drops in his hat.

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By *DAnnetteTV/TS
6 weeks ago

Daventry

A horny CD called Annette,

Loves a cock in her cute ass, you bet,

She's had all girths and sizes,

And some huge surprises,

But not a ten incher as yet.

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By *starMan
6 weeks ago

Stroud

A chap who was on here called Bruce

Had a bum that became rather loose

People say when they ride him

They might find inside him

A dildo, some fruit or a goose!

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By *0yguyMan
6 weeks ago

Cumberland

"There is a site called fabguys

Where fun could be got if your wise

To avoid the fake tossers

And other chance prossers

Make sure that you open your eyes"

That’s the winner!

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

The truly gay men have huge cocks

And emphasise this with their jocks

Their choice of attire

When sex is on fire

Is making smooth love, in their socks

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

We of homosexual genus

Admire an appendage so venous

By choice we select

A tool so erect

The magnificent, wonderful penis

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

(with apologies to geneticists everywhere)

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By *hilmeMan
6 weeks ago

Bournemouth

There's a bitv from Bournemouth who's know as Brenda the bender when looking for cock she wears a dress satin knickers and suspenders

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By *starMan
6 weeks ago

Stroud

Old Rosie, who's just started dressing

Wonders just why he does, she's confessing

But she's since been well fucked

By a couple of bucks

Which would help to explain it, I'm guessing.

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By *ruemaleMan
6 weeks ago

notts

There was a young man from Gosham

Who took out his balls to wash em

His wife said Jack

If you don't but em back

I'll tread on the sods and squashem

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By *dstefi OP Man
6 weeks ago

Solihull

There was a young fella from Rhyl

Who liked to be dressed up to kill

In knickers and stockings

He'd tuck his wee cock in

And now he's gone from Jack to Jill

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By *DAnnetteTV/TS
6 weeks ago

Daventry

Annette is a horny CD,

With an ass that's as cute as can be,

Just open her wide,

And then cum inside,

Oh, such a fuck slut is she.

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By *wiganguyMan
6 weeks ago

wigan

There once was a man from Nantucket

Who's arse was the size of a bucket

He tried out a vibrating toy

And hung men without joy

But fell in love with a saturn 5 rocket

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By *ruemaleMan
6 weeks ago

notts

A woman called Hyacinth Bucket

Could never say "oh well then just fuck it"

She's so prim and proper

And nothing could stop her

From rolling her eyes when told " Suck it"

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By *aremanMan
5 weeks ago

Hingham

Versatility.

If you're a man's man, attack

My arse as I lie on my back

If you prefer cunt

Roll me on my front

And pretend I've got one in my crack

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By *dstefi OP Man
5 weeks ago

Solihull

"Versatility.

If you're a man's man, attack

My arse as I lie on my back

If you prefer cunt

Roll me on my front

And pretend I've got one in my crack"

Applause! That sounds very original (the aim of this thread according to me

)

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By *aremanMan
5 weeks ago

Hingham

"Applause! That sounds very original (the aim of this thread according to me )"

Thank you! I understood the aim and tried to correct it - a lot of old material up there!

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By *starMan
5 weeks ago

Stroud

Thank you! I understood the aim and tried to correct it - a lot of old material up there!

Two of mine are entirely my own work, one is mildly adapted from an old chestnut.

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By *ruemaleMan
5 weeks ago

notts

As is two of mine which are my own work.

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By *dstefi OP Man
5 weeks ago

Solihull

As are all of mine. Making them up on the fly is a sort of hobby.

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By *aremanMan
5 weeks ago

Hingham

All mine, including...

A young feller from Barnard Castle

Received an unusual parcel.

"What can it be for?"

He asked, "And how sore

Will it be when it goes up my arsehole?"

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By *aremanMan
5 weeks ago

Hingham

Oop North version...

Me marra, who's from Barnard Castle,

Bought a vibrating plug with a tassel,

But speedily found

That, turned wrong way round,

Inserting the thing was a hassle.

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By *ip71Man
5 weeks ago

Darlington

There was a young man from Dundee

Who invented a wanking machine

On the 99th stroke

The fucking thing broke

And it whipped his balls to ice ream.

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By *aremanMan
5 weeks ago

Hingham

"There was a young man from Dundee

Who invented a wanking machine

On the 99th stroke

The fucking thing broke

And it whipped his balls to ice ream.

It was a young fellow from Cheam, the last line doesn't even pretend to scan, and you didn't write it (see original post)

Nul points.

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By *hiteroseMan
5 weeks ago

Neverwhere

"There was a young man from Dundee

Who invented a wanking machine

On the 99th stroke

The fucking thing broke

And it whipped his balls to ice ream.

It was a young fellow from Cheam, the last line doesn't even pretend to scan, and you didn't write it (see original post)

Nul points."

I thought it was from 'The Good Ship Venus' ...

'Twas on the Good Ship Venus

By God you should have seen us

The figure head

Was nude in bed

Sucking a dead man's penis.

The first mate's name was MacLean

He invented a wanking machine

On the 99th stroke

The damn thing broke

And mashed his balls to cream.

There were probably more verses, but I can't remember them.

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By *ip71Man
5 weeks ago

Darlington

My versions better period.

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By *aremanMan
5 weeks ago

Hingham

@ Whiterose:

Fair enough. "Cheam" wasn't right either!

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By *addy DaddycoolMan
5 weeks ago

Darlington

There is a yng man from Devizes

Who loves cock of all shapes and all sizes

He'll suck and he'll fuck

Till you both chuck your muck

And he sometimes wears funny disguises

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By *DAnnetteTV/TS
5 weeks ago

Daventry

A hot CD schoolgirl Annette,

Takes all the cock she can get,

Whether a thick length or thin,

Just push it right in,

As she likes to be teacher's pet

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By *dstefi OP Man
5 weeks ago

Solihull

CD Stef's body hair is quite sparse

Fur-haters have no need to pass

He does like to roger

A nicely smooth todger

And take semen balm straight up the arse

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By *hiteroseMan
5 weeks ago

Neverwhere

"@ Whiterose:

Fair enough. "Cheam" wasn't right either!"

Cheam is fine darling. It rhymes ... very nearly.

There's no right or wrong, we probably all learned slightly different versions.

The important thing is we're all trying our best. Better an iffy contribution, than none at all.

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By *ndrew47Man
5 weeks ago

Southampton

When I was young I was blessed with a very large cock, mind you the priest is in prison now.

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By *orwdMan
5 weeks ago

Sheffield

I read it as Limp dicks...like mine...which is not funny.

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